The United Way realized that it had never received a donation from the
city's most successful trial lawyer. So a United Way volunteer paid the
lawyer a visit in his lavish office.

The volunteer opened the meeting by saying, "Our research shows that even
though your annual income is over two million dollars, you don't give a
penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give something back to your community
through the United Way?"

The lawyer thinks for a minute and says, "First, did your research also show
you that my mother is dying after a long, painful illness and she has huge
medical bills that are far beyond her ability to pay?"

Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbles, "Uh... no, I didn't know that."

"Secondly," says the lawyer, "my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and
confined to a wheelchair and is unable to support his wife and six
children."

The stricken United Way rep begins to stammer an apology, but is cut off
again.

"Thirdly, did your research also show you that my sister's husband died in a
dreadful car accident, leaving her penniless with a mortgage and three
children one of whom is disabled and another has learning disabilities
requiring an array of private tutors?"

The humiliated United Way rep, completely beaten, says, "I'm sorry, I had no
idea".

And the lawyer says, "Well, if I didn't give money to them, what makes you think I
would give any to you?"

It's rarely rocket science, it's usually just math: then again if you can't do the math.......