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His and Hers Showers

How To Shower Like a Woman

Take off clothes and place them sectioned in laundry basket
according to lights and darks.
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
If you see partner along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups / leg-lifts, etc.
Get in the shower.
Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins...
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with jojoba.
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red...
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
Rinse conditioner off hair.
Shave armpits and legs.
Turn off shower.
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
Spray mold spots with Tile cleaner.
Get out of shower.
Dry with towel the size of a small country.
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
If you see partner along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

How To Shower Like a Man

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
Walk naked to the bathroom.
If you see partner along the way, shake willy at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
Admire the size of your willy and scratch your bum.
Get in the shower.
Pee.
Wash your face.
Wash your armpits.
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
Wash your a$$, leaving those coarse hairs stuck on the soap.
Wash your hair.
Make a Shampoo Mohican.
Pee again.
Rinse off and get out of shower.
Partially dry off.
Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of bath the whole time.
Admire willy size in mirror again. Take special note that it seems bigger after the hot shower.
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
If you pass partner, pull off towel, shake willy at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
Throw wet towel on bed

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I didn't start the spelling!!

And someone proofed it, In USA , And just passed that test!!

I'm Glad the Queens English is sill spoke & understood.

Amercia with its own weights & measure's plus the destruction of english , has moved into Phonically , so they all won't be left behind

That was a Romney's Amercia popo ..

VT

thats "phonetically".

Size perspective

http://htwins.net/scale2/scale2.swf?bordercolor=white

Thanks Champ = this is very interesting. I'm going to send the link to my grandsons (also twins)

Sally Mullihan of Coral Springs, Florida decided to take one of the jobs that most Americans are not willing to do.

She applied for a job in a Florida lemon grove but seemed far too highly qualified for the job. She had a liberal arts degree from the University of Michiganand had worked as a social worker and school teacher throughout her career.

The foreman frowned at her and said, "I have to ask you, have you had any actual experience in picking lemons?"
"Well, as a matter of fact, I have. I've been divorced three times, owned two Chryslers and voted for Obama."

There was a bit of confusion at the store this morning. When I was
ready to pay for my groceries, the cashier said, "Strip down facing me."

Making a mental note to complain to my congressman about Homeland
Security running amok, I did just as she had instructed.

When the hysterical shrieking and alarms finally subsided, I found out
that she was referring to my credit card.

I have been asked to shop elsewhere in the future.

They need to make their instructions to us seniors a little clearer!

This is an ad for Calcutta, Pretty cool hand work!

http://www.youtube.com/embed/ryFQFzN6AMk?hd=1

Cool!