AmbergrisCaye.com Home Forums Talk Belize Chat Area Joke Thread

A man got on the plane to Belize and there was a beautiful blonde sitting in his seat in 1st class. He said "Excuse me, but you are sitting in my seat". She said "I'm blond, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Belize and I'm not moving". He got the flight attendant and asked her to please speak to the lady in his seat. The flight attendant looked at the lady's ticket and told her she was supposed to be in coach, not 1st class and she needed to move. The blond said "I'm blond, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Belize and I'm not moving". The flight attendant got the pilot and explained the situation to him. He spoke to the blond and told her she would have to move to her seat in coach. The blond again said "I'm blond, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Belize and I'm not moving". The pilot thought for a minute and then leaned down and whispered something in her ear. She immediately got up and went to her seat in coach. The passenger and flight attendant looked at him in amazement and asked what he said to her. The pilot said "I told her 1st class was not going to Belize".

Cat Mot - your joke reminds me of this riddle:
What's a four letter word that ends in K and means "intercourse?"

What do you have if you have 1 green ball in your left hand and 1 green ball in your right hand? Complete control of the Jolly Green Giant.

that would be "talk"

Bingo, puppy

Hah. Motivator pre-empted by Prevaricator.

The 'tors, obviously, have it.

'tors high on my list - still, though, is whatever you "have" catchy????

Yeah, sure, catm, as long as yer not a dissen"tor". (see other thread for reference)

Hey! You gals keep forgetting the jokes!! This thread requires a sense of humo(u)r and there are plenty of other, way less funny, threads to jump on if you're lacking!! :p

A guy is out with buddies, has few drinks and is feeling a little frisky. But, true to his wife, goes home.

He finds her sound asleep in bed with her mouth wide open, so he gets two aspirin and drops them in her mouth.

She starts to choke, but recovers and asks, "What did you put in my mouth?"

"Two aspirin," he says.

She replies, "BUT I DON'T HAVE A HEADACHE!"

He says, "That's all I wanted to hear."

OK OK. Here goes....

A newly born sperm was receiving instructions in conception from the instructor, "As soon as you hear the siren, run for the tunnel and swim in
a straight line until you get to the entrance of a damp cavern. At the end of the cavern you will find a red, sticky ball which is the egg. Address it and say, 'I'm a Sperm.' She will answer, 'I'm the Egg.' From that moment on you will work together to create the embryo. Do you understand?"

The sperm nodded affirmatively. The instructor impressed upon the sperm that he had to swim hard and reach the egg first,otherwise it would all be
pointless. "You really have to swim for it!" Two days later, the sperm is taking a nap when he hears the siren. He wakes up immediately and runs to the tunnel. A multitude of sperm swim behind him. He knows he has to arrive first. When he nears the entrance to the cavern, he looks back and sees that he is far ahead of the other sperm but he still swims his heart out, tail fin aching, just to reach the egg first. At last he approaches the red, sticky ball, still way ahead of all the other sperm. When, at last, he reaches the red, sticky ball, he smiles and says, "Hi,I'm a sperm." The red sticky ball smiles and says, "Hi,I'm a tonsil."