THE IRISH PROSTITUTE
The Irish daughter had not been home for over five years. Upon her return,
her father cursed her heavily saying, "Where have ye been all this time,
child? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call?
Can ye not understand what ye put yer old Mother through?"


The girl, crying, replied, "....Dad....I became a prostitute..."

"Ye what? Out of here ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to
this Catholic family!"

"OK, Dad-- As ye wish, but I just came back to give Mum this luxurious fur
coat, title deed to a ten bedroom mansion plus a five million pound savings
certificate. For me little brother, this gold Rolex. And for ye, Daddy, the
sparkling new Mercedes Limited Edition convertible parked outside plus a
membership to the country club...(takes a breath)... and an invitation for
ye all to spend New Year's Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera."

"Now what was it ye said ye had become?" asks Dad.

Girl, crying again, "....A prostitute, Daddy!"

"Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a
Protestant. Come here and give yer old Dad a hug!"

Reality is only an illusion that occurs due to a lack of alcohol