A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of the
Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked, 'What are all those clocks for?'

St. Peter answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone who has ever
been on earth has a Lie-Clock.

Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move.'

'Oh', said the man. 'Whose clock is that?'

'That's Mother Teresa's', replied St. Peter. 'The hands have
never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.'

'Incredible', said the man. 'And whose clock is that one?'

St. Peter responded, 'That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands
have moved twice, telling us that Abraham told only two lies in his entire
life.'
'Where's Obama's clock?' asked the man.

St Peter replied, 'Jesus has it in his office. He uses it as a
ceiling fan.'


Reality is only an illusion that occurs due to a lack of alcohol